I will confess that most of these reviews will leave you thinking, “Heidi, why did you even read these? Some of these seem like real duds!” Honestly, May has been a month full of distractions, and I pretty much had to rely on available audio books to get any reading done. Finish anything at all took effort, so I’m winning with what I’ve got!

Total Books: 7
Physical: 1
Audio: 4
Mix: 2
DNF: 2

Genre: Science-Fiction
Format: Audio/Physical Mix
Rating: 3.75/5

If you are a nerd in need of delight, read this book! Although the setting is a depressing dystopian landscape, an adorable robot just wants to serve people. Joined by a character called “the wonk”, Uncharles the Valet goes on a quest to complete his tasks. This book is sometimes slow and wordy and preachy, but it’s funny and sweet and will scratch of itch of wanting to read a sci-fi tale.

Genre: RomCom/Action
Format: Audio
Rating: 3.25/5

This was big, dumb fun – but also a little obnoxious. Ha! If you are a fan of characters that fall into insta-love and cheesy action movies, this would be a good read. She’s a professor, he’s the nephew of a deceased “fixer”. They meet, are super hot for each other (rated PG), she gets kidnapped, hijinx ensues! Just like the movie Speed, the new relationship would never make it long term. However, the book explicitly states several times their attraction is NOT situational. (It’s totally situational, and it’s a good thing the epilogue was three months later instead of three years later…they are doomed.)

Genre: Science-Fiction
Format: Physical/Audio Mix
Rating: 3.25/5

My husband likes this series a lot, and it’s now a show on Apple+! Maybe it was reading two robot books so close together…Maybe it was being dropped into the story with extremely little world building…Maybe it was the 1/2 human, 1/2 clone concept that confused me. But it was just fine for me. I actually really like how they did the first episode of the series, so I might pick up the next one someday to keep going with the TV show – but I have other stories beating this series in the reading priority queue!

Genre: YA Sci-fi-ish
Format: Audio
Rating: 2/5

This books answers the questions: What if Percy Jackson was less fun? What if Hermione was a damsel in distress and Hagrid died?
In other words, this was not great. It had SO much potential and then fizzled. Hard. The “romance” was so uncomfortable and the language was unnecessary. It was written like a cheesy middle grade book about an alien being a new kid in school – but then they threw in some make out sessions and swears to make it YA. Ew. The only interesting character was brought in during the last 10% to set it up for the next book, but I will gladly stop the series here.

Genre: Fiction
Format: Audio
Rating: (a generous) 2.5/5

I feel bad marking this book lower than a “3” on Goodreads, because I knew this wasn’t going to be for me. I finally picked up an Elin Hilderbrand book, because it checked off a library challenge category for a writer who has attended the Iowa Writer’s Workshop. I would be willing to try her books again, but this one was not for me. If you like lies of omission and love triangles where every combination is toxic, I have a book for you! This book is a very long set up to a sequel and the most interesting part was in the last 30 seconds. Boo.

Genre: Memoir/Comedy
Format: Audio
Rating: 4.25/5

If you like Nate Bargatze’s stand-up, you will likely enjoy this book. It’s a bit of an organizational mess and full of rambling stories, but it’s fun and good for a laugh.

Genre: Fiction
Format: Physical
Rating: 3.25/5

Oh, senior-citizens-solving-murder-books, I just can’t stop trying to like you. Life Freida McFadden thrillers, I keep coming back – even though I know it’s just not for me. It’s a recurring joke that Vera describes herself as a helpless old woman. She is portrayed like a confused 87 year old, which is often annoying, since she’s really in her early 60s. Anyway, there was nothing wrong with this book, but it took me over a month to finish it. It was funny and charming and had an interesting ending, but I actually paused it multiple times to read other books. I didn’t want to quit it, because there was nothing “wrong” with it. It was just a slog for me to finish. Anyway, if you like nosy busy bodies, Vera is your gal.

After a no-quit-April, the “quit list” is back in play. D’oh!

I was really looking forward to this one, but I had to stop at a mere 14%. I tried it in physical and audio form, but I had to call it. Why? Well, a 33 year old woman returns to the lake where she lived when she was 17 – and basically regresses to all the feelings and angst and longing of being 17. I do not need to be or feel like being 17 again. Next!

DNF it once, shame on you. DNF it twice, shame on me. I really tried, Sanderson! After 25% on the second attempt, I finally called it. If the character said “storms!” or “damnation!” one more time, I was going to lose my mind. Premise was cool, but it was not for me.

I tried to start this one twice. Apparently I like my Hazelwood characters a little bit older. I did not want to read about college angst or doing it. I am officially elderly. If there’s going to be lusty youth, there better be dragons and near-death situations involved. I don’t need this realistic ridiculousness.

I also started these books. I’m not ready to quit them yet, but I am not in the mood. They will be put in my later pile, for I am in a reading SLUMP, y’all!

That said, it’s SUMMER VACATION! May the FUN reading commence! Best of luck to you, fellow readers, and send me some FUN summer reading recommendations. If it has cancer, grief, sad animals, family conflict, or old people solving crime, I don’t want it. Give me quests and funny and sidekicks and mysteries and adventure and weirdos. MMwah!